Word Mental Health Day

October 10th is World Mental Health Day. I talk a lot about mental health on my blog. I have been affected by mental illness since I was a teenager. Growing up, my parents were very open about mental health and, having experienced anxiety and depression first hand, were able to recognize when I started exhibiting signs of anxiety and depression when I was around fifteen years old.

I have come to realize that not everyone grows up in an environment where mental health is talked about in a very open and honest way. There are many people out there who have no idea that they are not alone in feelings of sadness, or fear or hopelessness. People who have no idea that there is a whole network of people out there dedicated to helping those with mental health issues and getting them to a place where they can enjoy their lives again. Today is about shedding light on mental health and ending the stigma that seeking help for your mental health issues is something to be ashamed of.

One thing I have noticed that concerns me is the trend of “pill shaming”. The idea that there is something wrong with people if they are taking medication to help manage their mental health. If you had a physical illness and there was a medication available to you that would make you feel better would you stop for one second to wonder “what will people think if I take this medication?”…nope! You would take the meds, and get better! So there is no shame in seeking help from a medical professional if you suspect that you are struggling from anxiety or depression. They are there to help you, and they can help.

Now, I am not saying that there is a magical pill out there that will just cure your anxiety or your depression. There are many tools that I have added to my proverbial tool belt to help me combat my anxiety problems. To name a few; Meditation, Self Care, Writing (my personal writing as well as blogging), Eating Healthy, Counseling, Regular Exercise

One of the techniques that has helped me the most, not just during panic attacks, but also during physical discomfort from MS, illness, etc. is meditation.

I was recently watching an episode of “In Search Of” hosted by Zachary Quinto and they were searching for the answers to how some people are able to exhibit super human strength or feats during periods of meditation.

He was specifically looking at a Shaolin warrior monk who through meditation, is able to complete tasks that would usually leave a human seriously injured. However this monk walks away with not even a scratch to be seen. For example, in this episode the Shaolin warrior monk breaks a wooden staff* over his head. He never loses consciousness, finches, and claims to feel no pain whatsoever!

*** No matter how good you are at meditation I am NOT recommending you do this…unless you are a Shaolin warrior monk…then I guess go ahead.

In search of (haha get it?) an answer as to how this monk is able to endure these superhuman feats Zachary, the monk, and one other person conduct an experiment where they took two MRI scans of their brains. The first scan was a regular scan, but during the second scan the men were asked to put their hand in extremely cold ice water. They were specifically looking for the area of the brain that recognizes pain to light up.

As suspected, when Zachary Quinto put his hand into the ice water his scan showed the pain receptor area of his brain lighting up like a Christmas tree. But when the monk did this same test, while meditating and centering himself into a place a of tranquility, his scan showed extremely limited activity in the pain receptor area of the brain!

Even more interesting, Zachary went into the MRI machine one more time to test just how successful he could be at lowering his pain level through meditation. His scan, while meditating, noted a significant decrease in activity in the pain center of the brain.

Even the doctor who was helping them conduct this tests were baffled at how affective meditation was at physically changing the way our bodies received and reacted to pain!

I have not been feeling great with a stomach bug the past few days and I have found meditation extremely helpful to help ease my discomfort. Sometimes, if your discomfort is too high to even concentrate on a full meditation even just focusing on your breathing can help. “In…two…three…four…out…two…three…for”. That phrase has gotten me through many a tough moment over the past year.

So today if you are struggling with a battle against mental illness, or if you know someone who is, let us all remember that there is always hope, there is always light, and there is an army of people around you (including me!) that are cheering you on and supporting you every step of your journey!

Let’s share some positive vibes today.

-A

 

 

 

5 Facts About My Anxiety

Anxiety is the most common mental illness in the United States. It affects over 40 million adults a year just in the U.S. alone.

The sad part is that well under 50% of people with anxiety seek treatment for it.

Anxiety is very different from simply feeling anxious. Everyone feels anxious at times in their life. It is completely normal and healthy to feel anxious before a big test, a job interview or airplane flight. Anxiety is your body’s way of taking care of you. It’s way of saying “Hey! This could be “dangerous”. We should be careful!” It’s a primal instinct that we all use to this day. The issue arises when you cannot shut off that anxious feeling after the test is over and the flight has landed long ago. It becomes an issue when day-to-day things like making a phone call or riding in a car send you into a panic attack. It becomes an issue when you are no longer in control of your life, anxiety is.

There are different types of anxiety disorders. Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD), Panic Attack Disorder, and Social Anxiety are just a few of the most common.

There is a sort of taboo around mental illness. I do think that our society has made some very positive steps forward regarding shining a light on mental health issues and taking away some of the stigma around it. We need to talk about it. We cannot ignore our mental health any longer.

I remember, way back in my freshman year of high school, a classmate of mine confided in me that she was going to kill herself that night. She made me promise not to tell anyone and said she would hate me forever if I did.

I confided in my best friend and we were so scared for this girl that we knew we couldn’t keep this secret. We told the crisis help group at our high school. The next class period the classmate who had confided in me was taken out of the classroom by a counselor. She did not kill herself, but she did keep her promise to hate me from that point forward.

I was absolutely wracked with guilt. I felt like I had broken someone’s trust and done something wrong. I recall talking to a priest about it at one point soon after. He said something that has stuck with me my whole life. He said;

“There is nothing bad about what you did. Evil thrives in darkness. What you did was shine a light on it so it could not thrive anymore. Sometimes shining a light is all you can do.”

So I have continued to try to shine a light on mental illness. For too long it has thrived in the darkness, hidden in the shadows and only spoken about in hushed tones. Well, times up. Not anymore.

1. My anxiety makes me physically ill. Anxiety doesn’t always manifest in the “classic” way that one would think it would. For me my symptoms of anxiety can range from trouble breathing, shaking, shivering, flushing, nausea, headaches, vomiting, inability to focus, panic attacks and more.
2. My anxiety makes me flakey. This is something I really do not like about my anxiety. I absolutely hate that there is a fear inside me that is powerful enough to make me want to cancel on things I want to do. I have been working on this a lot lately. Having a chronic illness, I am constantly having to check in with myself to see if my symptoms are from MS or Anxiety. I can usually tell, it’s funny, I can actually tell the difference between an anxiety stomach ache and an actual stomach flu stomach ache. When I feel sick from it I try to acknowledge to myself that what I am feeling is anxiety and that is OK. Acknowledging it is half the battle.
3. My anxiety makes me lash out. I am not proud of this. Sometimes I will not even realize that my anxiety is bubbling up inside me, coming dangerously close to boiling over. Then someone will ask an innocent question, or my dog will bark to try to get my attention and I will snap and say something with a sharp tone, or make some snarky response. I immediately feel guilt and know that I am not really angry at that person, or mad at my dog. I am anxious and, like a wounded animal trapped in a corner, I have lashed out. Then, I have to remind myself that I can leave that corner whenever I want to. Anxiety is not in control of my actions, I am. 
4. I see two doctors, take 4 medications and meditate daily to help manage my anxiety. I cannot emphasize enough how important my mental health care team has been to me. They have helped me navigate and understand my illness. They have given me coping strategies and techniques to help me during panic attacks. They have made me realize I am not at all alone in this fight. My psychiatrist has helped me navigate that difficult world of finding the right medications for my body chemistry to help me find balance. If you suffer from a mental illness and have not talked to someone about it please reach out to your local crisis hotline. They can help direct you to a licensed therapist or psychiatrist in your area to get you the help you need. You do not have to fight this alone. You are not alone!
5. I am not ashamed of my anxiety. Yes, it is a part of my life (sometimes a very big part) but it does not define me. I talk about my anxiety so publicly because I know there are people out there, silently suffering, and they need to know that there is nothing to be ashamed of. They need to know that there is a rainbow at the end of the storm. They need to know that help is out there, all you have to do is ask.

Please, reach out to your loved ones. Check in with them and make sure they are doing ok. If you are feeling anxious or depressed or just “off” tell someone! If you don’t feel like you have someone you can tell, reach out to your local crisis hotline.

You are not alone. You are worth it. You are stronger than you know. Together we can shine a light on mental illness and help each other find the help that we need! Stand strong, warrior.

-A